Sing for the joy that's found in setting up the pins and knocking them down
Thursday, January 15, 2015
Things you stumble upon...
I'll be honest, I've had just a couple of people ask me if I ever thought that Eric was trying to send me messages from where he is right now. I can say that after 22 years of him hardly ever not talking to me, if there was a way for him to talk to me from the other side he would have certainly utilized it. Enough said.
But just because I don't ever hear his voice, doesn't mean that his words aren't all around me. I find his words in my head, coming out of my kids' mouths, on notes and on lists, lots and lots of lists. This weekend I stumbled upon his words in the form of a past Valentine's card. For those of you who want to know about our Valentine's Day traditions--or lack thereof--please refer to my post about Mother's Day and drop in Valentine's Day--but maybe not quite as bad. What I stumbled upon was a lovely Hallmark card that didn't have any tell-tale signs of frantically being purchased at Cub Foods. The card's sentiment was simple. "I love sharing forever with you. Happy Valentine's Day."
On a side note, we used to laugh because Eric claimed that nearly all Valentine's Day cards started with "You know that I never tell you enough how I feel...." and clearly that didn't apply to him. It was one of his reasons for mostly boycotting the holiday.
As I read what he had written on the bottom, it sounded so familiar. "What is one year when compared to forever? I would go through it all again just to be by your side. I love you." It sounded familiar because those words are nearly the exact words I tell myself when I stand still in the scurrying of my day to look at his picture on my living room wall. It's how I comfort myself when sleep escapes me on these cold winter nights. It's the encouragement that I cling to when I look out at the years ahead of me. What is one year compared to forever and yes, a thousand times, yes, I would go through it all again to be by his side. I thought these were my words of comfort and hope, but there they were in his scribbly handwriting, loving me so sweetly from years ago.
Just so you don't get the idea that every Valentine's Day was wine, roses and love notes, I also discovered another Valentine's card that was likely purchased the day after the holiday because some wife probably pitched a fit that there wasn't a card for her on Hallmark's favorite day. If you're Eric Rynders, you will find a creative way to make your wife smile even when you miss her holiday.