Sing for the joy that's found in setting up the pins and knocking them down

Sunday, December 3, 2017

What I Miss



I miss the sound of his voice.

I miss his wisdom in parenting.

I miss his ability to make everyone feel they were important and that he had unhurried time for them.

I miss the smell of the skin on his shoulder as I curled up behind him on a sleepy Saturday morning.

I miss him asking if my car needs its oil changed.

I miss seeing his face when I walk through the door after a long day at work.

I miss him singing or talking in the shower.

I miss how he was always teaching the kids something--always.

I miss his advice.

I miss hearing about something he wished he had invented.

I miss his prayers at the dinner table.

I miss his very long voice mail messages.

I miss finding his daily lists.

I miss his patient homework help.

I miss his spaghetti dinners.

I miss his ebelskiver breakfasts.

I miss the curiosity that filled his days.

I miss him saying, "It's going to be alright."

I miss his confidence in feeling that anything was possible.

I miss his sense of humor.

I miss all the questions he always asked the kids.

I miss debating any and all topics on road trips.

I miss his bravery.

I miss WWII shows.

I miss his steady faith.

I miss his encouragement and belief in me.

I miss his conviction to do something significant in this world.

I miss being a partner.  I miss being his partner.


It's tiring work to miss someone deeply, knowing that the ache is not going to be satisfied by a phone call, a holiday visit or the reunion when someone walks through your door.  You have to learn to live with the missing.  As we pass by year 4 we're getting better at that.  Or at least we're trying.  I tell people often, he is worth missing. 

In this Advent season, we find comfort in the reunion that we're promised.  An infant king born into this broken and sad world who will wipe away every tear and give us the hope of a time when all things will be made right. When all this missing will come to an end.  When we are reunited with those we love and the God who gave us that ability to love...and miss. Until then, we'll hang on to His promises of that reunion.

II Corinthians 4:16-18

16 Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 
17 For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 

18 So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.